dr molly tov

So many feelings

Since the start of January, I have:

And I have the following works in progress:

These are major changes, and I'm glad I made them. They have reignited my joy in the Internet - and they have made my offline life better too.

Yet, as with any big change, they also come with Big Feelings. Now that the claws of Big Tech are loosening, I'm starting to understand just how badly the "five sites sharing screenshots of the other four" have messed with me all these years.

I keep recovering little memories I thought I lost. None of them are good. Times I ignored my baby niece (who is 16 now) for my phone. All the times Spouse and I scrolled or shared Facebook arguments with one another - all the time we lost together. The years I spent writing the most plastic Internet slop for my Big Professional Blog - not even for SEO purposes so much as because I bought the lie that that was what the people wanted.

Web 2.0 literally changed the way I write. The thing I have done for a living since I was 17. And I let it.

I don't blame myself. I'm not sure what else I would have done, given the circumstances. But I grieve.


*actually I still have my FB login, because I am the "legacy contact" for my late spouse's page. I promised Spouse's parents I'd leave it up, as it means a lot to them. But that account is now linked to a throwaway email address and I removed all my posts (though I'm sure Meta still has them).